Added: 497 days ago by Kevin Holmes | Posted in: Politics | 9 Comments

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<div align='center'><a href='http://www.kontraband.com/blog/14540/The-10-Best-Black-Presidents-From-TV-The-Silver-Screen/'>The 10 Best Black Presidents From TV & The Silver Screen</a><br><div align='center'></div><br><a href='http://www.kontraband.com/blog'>See more like this on kontraband.com</a></div>

So with a few days gone since THE MOST IMORTANT ELECTION IN THE HISTORY OF THE KNOWN UNIVERSE© the Democrats and Obama are in, chimp idiocy and warmongering for oil are, hopefully, out. Change is allegedly imminent, with all the world's ills being solved on January 20th when Obama's inaugurated. So hoorah for change even if it turns out to be only skin deep, only the passing of time will tell...

Although the whole world's gone crazy for Obama and what his election may or may not signify, calling him the first black president isn't strictly true, because we all know TV and film gets to ideas way before they happen in the real world, and there's not been any shortage of black presidents, so here's a rundown of the top (probably only) ten, in no particular order, from the screen both big and small.

1. President Black Bush (Dave Chappelle)
Comedy genius Chappelle gives us Black Bush (that's president) whose all "Not on my watch, that's not how I roll!" and we even get a Black Tony Blair from back in the day. An hilarious president and worryingly his case for war in Iraq sounds more substantiated than Bush's, even with talk of dangerous aluminium tubes and the dreaded WMD that is...(drum roll)...yellow cake! Something which Sadam supposedly bought from Africa, the "cradle of f#cking civilisation!" y'all! It definitely looks like more of a riot than the last war ridden, environment butchering, debt concluded 8 years, what with a Flavor Flav look-alike as Head Of CIA. I can mos def dig it, get Chuck D as Vice-President and watch him liven the senate up with the rhythm, the rebel! The White House - suckers never play me! If Obama's administration is half as cool, the next four years'll be pretty f#cking fly! This man's got his priorities right. "Mars, bitches and no gays settling down!"

2. The 40th President Of the United States (Richard Pryor)
The world's greatest stand-up and booty star beat Chappelle to it, so we could say he's the original President Badass. What a presidency that would be, we'd all be freebasing cocaine and shagging our way through more interns a week than Bill Clinton's undressed with his tiny Lilliputian pin eyes. Get Gene Wilder as Vice-President and every day would be a slapstick comedy ruckus! See No Axis Of Evil, Hear No Axis Of Evil! It'd be great, nothing would be taken seriously, everyday would be a blast and the running of the free world would fall into ruin, with only chaos left to dig us out of some economic and environmental abyss! I say yay!

3. President Tom Beck (Morgan Freeman)
From lame-ass film Deep Impact. He'd be a more serious president, with his staid grey hair and unmistakeably sincere Muppet-esque voice - the annoying sh#t. He'd definitely hold sway with the masses though, people love a bit of sincerity, especially in their leader. In fact, Saint Freeman's looked at with the same austerity as God himself, and he's played him, as well as Batman's business manager, so he'd be used to looking after spoilt brats with millions to spend (read funders of the Republican party). My only qualm is that in Deep Impact that asteroid hit Earth, so he didn't do much good in savings us. He should've used his giant head to act as something to deflect it with instead. F#cking idiot. Next!

4. President David Palmer (Dennis Haysbert)
From the TV series 24. Now David Palmer was a pretty f#cking cool president; I reckon he subconsciously paved the way for Obama's win. Jack Bauer's only true ally and all round mofo. He started off as a senator, but by season 2 he's in like Dubya on a second term and then out like JFK, snipered from the series in Season 5, only to end up in the inferior The Unit about some military Delta-Force covert style bunch of beef-jerky's...But he cleared the way nicely for his not so cool brother...

5. President Wayne Palmer (D.B.Woodside)
Wayne. I mean, come on!!! No one wants a president called Wayne, not even Wayne himself. He just hasn't got the gravitas of David, he's too weedy, plus would the president really look like a member of Boyz II Men with his stupid goaty and bald head - Looks like a hard ass, acts like a jack ass. Thumbs down.

6. President Lindberg (Tommy 'Tiny' Lister)
He's from the Fifth Element, incase you're wondering "Who the f#ck is this dicksh#t?" Not just president of the USA, but president of Earth! (Or the President of the United Federated Territories, 'cos we're obviously so enlightened by then) How's about that? The very notion of a president of Earth is preposterous with all the fighting about pathetic dum-ass belief systems and petty squabbling over bits of dirt, so this will remain safely sci-fi. I seem to remember him being a bit of a jobs worth in the film and a bit dim, so we'll have to file him under 'N' for nob face.

7. President Douglas Dilman (James Earl Jones)
Sporting a not so attractive tash that looks like an octogenarian caterpillar, this is 'Darth Vader's voice' in 1972's The Man. 'Cos it was the 70s it's all very right-on, full of people with afros. I'm half-expecting Shaft to make an entrance as Head of Security and start laying waste to un-hip Senators before turning his fury on the masses. Vader's forced in to the job of President, as he's President Pro Tempore of the Senate and the president is dead with the vice-president refusing to take office. James L is another earnest type in the vein of Saint Freeman, so expect no fun fest, or possibly the reverse and some Vader-like bloodletting and telekinetic throat strangulation. One to watch methinks.

8. President Mays Gilliam (Chris Rock)
From the 2003 film Head of State, Chris Rock uses all manner of techniques to win the presidency, from getting the Klu Klux Khan to endorse his opponent to dubbing a video tape of Osama Bin Laden advocating the opposition. Chris Rock's nasal shrill-voice might grate after his 1000th public address but he sure is funny, well he used to be anyway, before he Pryor'ed-out and started doing films. He'd definitely be good fun, so he's definitely on the payroll. As the man himself says, "A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House." And now so can a Hawaiian born black man.

9. President Rufus Jones (Sammy Davis Jr)
The Glass-eyed rat-packer once played the Chief of Staff as young-black-child in 1933 musical comedy Rufus Jones for President. I'll admit it wasn't a massive hit, and it's only 21 minutes long, and it's now fallen into the depths of obscurity but it does exist and you've got to admit Sammy for prez would be f#cking awesome. Get old blues eyes for vice, Dean Martin as Chief Pisshead and we've got ourselves JFK's presidency all over again. Woohoo!

10. Barak Obama
I've been seeing this guy on TV a lot lately, but I can't quite place what I've seen him in...Hmm...Of course, how could we forget the president-elect, he may not be fiction, but he was for a while and he's certainly hoping to make change, rather than people just giving him some spare change. I'll raise a glass to him, and join the collective sigh of relief that Bush is finally going.

So there we have it, if there' s been any other President Badasses on film or TV I can't think of them, but allegedly Danny Glover's lined up to play one in a new film called 2012, so we'll have to wait and see. I'm sure over the next four years they'll be plenty of films showcasing a black president, so the list will grow and grow. But for now, that is all.

True. Dat.

Added: 497 days ago by Kevin Holmes | Posted in: Politics | 9 Comments

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