Added: 1031 days ago by Mardod | Posted in: Politics | 28 Comments

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<div align='center'><a href='http://www.kontraband.com/blog/17037/Teabaggers-Against-Tyranny/'>Teabaggers Against Tyranny</a><br><div align='center'></div><br><a href='http://www.kontraband.com/blog'>See more like this on kontraband.com</a></div>

So do you have any plans for U.S. Tax Day, April 15? Have you already filed your taxes, reeling and cursing by how much you owe? Complaining aloud to complete strangers how your government can spend so much money on things you disagree with, like the war in Iraq and Afghanistan, the financial services industry bailout, or universal health care? Well, what's left of the very rabid right of the Republican party have an offer for you. Instead of going to a bar and drinking your sorrows away with some beer, you can have tea. Except you don't drink this tea; you send it in the mail.

In case you don't watch CNBC, Fox News in general, or the Glenn Beck show specifically, you may have missed the (slightly-manufactured) populist revolt brewing across the plains and neighborhoods. It's called the Tea Party and its aim is to encourage citizens to play out a modern version of the Boston Tea Party of 1773. Although instead of throwing tea off a ship in an effort to protest excessive taxation without proper legislative representation, participants are encouraged to mail or hand deliver bags of tea to their federal and state representatives (for reasons passing understanding).

So what's the problem, you ask? Sounds like citizens finally engaging in their own civic well-being by raising an important issue. Well, it's hard to find a place to start. First it's the very name of the thing, which doesn't exactly bring to mind feelings of patriotism. Here's one reason. Here's a slightly more detailed one.

Still confused about the whole tea party concept and what it's likely to be in reality? Try this: if Coachella or Burning Man are both festivals to celebrate hedonism and complete freedom from the constraints of authority and control, then imagine its complete opposite. Instead of young freewheeling people in various states of dress cavorting about whatever the hell they can set on fire, imagine a group of overweight, laconic deeply bitter people who gauge patriotism by the size of the magnetic ribbons displayed on their pickup trucks who can barely be bothered to get out of their barcaloungers to get up, roll over to the AM/PM, pick up a box of Lipton and stage themselves a political rally. The Founders would be so proud.

As you probably guessed, this isn't exactly the grassroots movements it's being promoted as. And I do mean promoted. Heavily. On all the regular conservative media outlets; Fox News (who have gone so far as to call them the Fox News Tax Day Tea Party), the Rush Limbaugh show, every facet of the Republican National Committee, and every conservative columnist who wants to write about it. They even have theme music. Suck on that G20 protesters!

And, much like liberal protests, this one is also bringing out the loons on the fringe. One need only do a brief search on Google, Twitter, or Facebook to see the New World Order freaks, Black Helicopter fanatics, Obama-is-a-Muslim/wasn't born in the U.S. blowhards, and just straight-up racists all jumping on the band wagon for this one. The only difference between the right and the left in this regard is the left doesn't embrace their lunatics, while the right calls them their base. Are you feeling the excitement yet?

The main crux of their frustration started with the massive bailouts that Congress authorized using taxpayers' dollars. Many people on both sides of the political spectrum felt it was the wrong move and only served to award bad behavior when those bailouts were turned into bonuses for some of the very same people who caused the global financial crisis. Fair enough, there is plenty of room to debate that in a spirited manner, but at some point it morphed into a "the socialist government is going to raise my taxes so they can just give it away to the wealthy" lunacy that bears no resemblance to reality. These poor folks have been deluded into believing they are going to see an increase in their federal taxes when they are actually getting them cut. It's the upper class that are bound to see their taxes increased in an effort to reduce the amount that we are going to have to invariably borrow from China (a bad idea, but a subject for another rant). This "movement" is nothing more than staged political theater to draw out the worst in people convinced that the bulk of the country is behind them. Unfortunately, that isn't the case.

This poll released earlier this week by Gallup clearly shows the majority of Americans of all stripes and persuasions support the administration's efforts. So what we're talking about here are the remaining 30% or so of Americans who still cling to the belief that Bush and Cheney were the best thing EVAR. The same folks who think that Obama is a fascist, that cattle mutilations are the work of aliens from Area 51, that gay folks are out to destroy the institution of marriage (like heteros needed any help), that evolution is a myth, and that pr0n stars really orgasm on camera. You know, dolts. Treat them as such, just leave your teabagging for private time.

Added: 1031 days ago by Mardod | Posted in: Politics | 28 Comments

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