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40 Things You'll Never Hear From A Redneck
40. Oh I just couldn't. Hell, she's only sixteen.
39. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
38. Duct tape won't fix that.
37. Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael.
36. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.
35. We don't keep firearms in this house.
34. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?
33. You can't feed that to the dog.
32. I thought Graceland was tacky.
31. No kids in the back of the pick-up, it's just not safe.
30. Wrasslin's fake.
29. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
28. We're vegetarians.
27. Do you think my gut is too big?
26. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.
25. Honey, we don't need another dog.
24. Who's Richard Petty?
23. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
22. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
21. Spittin is such a nasty habit.
20. I just couldn't find a thing at Walmart today.
19. Trim the fat off that steak.
18. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
17. The tires on that truck are too big.
16. I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad.
15. I've got it all on the C drive.
14. Unsweetened tea tastes better.
13. Would you like your salmon poached or broiled?
12. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
11. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
10. Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
09. Checkmate.
08. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.
07. Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?
06. Hey, here's an episode of 'Hee Haw' that we haven't seen.
05. I don't have a favorite college team.
04. Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
03. I believe you cooked those green beans too long.
02. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.
01. Nope, no more for me. I'm drivin' tonight.
40 Things You'll Never Hear From A Redneck

40 THINGS YOU'LL NEVER HEAR FROM A REDNECK


Comments: 5

I know, only 40 you say? I couldn't believe it either...

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User Comments / Add a Comment »

 
 

awesome, funny as hell...
Added: 904 days ago by thumper117
 

 
 

33. you can't feed that to the dog. lol, poor dog..
Added: 1012 days ago by DeadDodo
 

 
 

Oh yes, it's southerner bating time!
Added: 1185 days ago by Strickly K
 

 
 

09. Checkmate : That made me laugh, the rest is but a chuckles worth.
Added: 1185 days ago by gerlin
 

 
 

Not all rednecks are southern, and not all southerners are rednecks.
Added: 1184 days ago by herrsmith
 

 
 
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