THE NEW CAPITALIST PYRAMID

My current roommate seemed pretty cool at first, until I realized that she sleeps ALL THE TIME. When I leave for my 9AM class, she's asleep. When I come back at around noon, she's asleep. After my 3PM class, she's asleep.

She wakes up at around 11PM, does homework until 3AM, then sleeps again. I literally couldn't make a sound in my room, EVER, or she would flip out. Well last weekend she went to visit home. We had just made a grocery run, and she bought TONS of perishable foods.

So after she left, I unplugged her fridge. On Sunday, when I knew she was about five minutes away, I plugged it back in. She basically came back to a hundred bucks of rotten food. Luckily she's not smart enough to realize what happened. Oops.

The shark was spotted by the pilot at an altitude of 7,000 ft over Christchurch International Airport in New Zealand. Glen Kenny, president of the New Zealand Air Line Pilots' Association, explained the inflatable shark actually had very little bite.

'The engine probably wouldn't stop, but it would do a bit of damage,' he said. 'Helium is an inert gas, so there's no issue in that regard. The biggest hazard would be startling the pilot.'

The bizarre sighting was just one of a string of unusual flying shark sightings across New Zealand, thanks to the popular Christmas gift known as Air Swimmers - remote-controlled helium fish.