HOLOGRAPHIC GOOGLE EARTH

Remember when you were a teen and it was cool to have some hair hanging down in front of your eyes? Well, according to Tasmanian optometrist Andrew Hogan, "trendy" hair might cause lazy eyes.

Hogan, who happens to be the education director for the Optometrists Association of Tasmania, said that amblyopia, also know as the lazy eye, can be caused by obstructed vision due to hair that flops over one of a person's eyes.

Hogan amusingly said, "If a young emo chap has a fringe covering one eye all the time, that eye won't see a lot of detail," and reiterated that if the hair is obstructing vision from a young age, that the eye can become lazy.

Controversial gas extraction technique 'fracking' has been given the go-ahead after experts concluded any further earthquakes in the Blackpool can only be a good thing.

The process involves forcing high pressure chemicals into places that aren't used to it beneath Blackpool, much like any one of the thousands of stag parties above the ground.

Fracking expert Simon Williams said, "This is great result for all concerned, as not only do we get access to a cheap natural resource, but any earthquakes could force Blackpool to drag its infrastructure into the 1980s. You know, we'll shake it up a bit, and then maybe they might be forced build something new that doesn't resemble a scene from Boardwalk Empire."