Merry Christmas lads. It's been an emotional year so what better way to look back on 2009 than with this comprehensive round up? We've got girls, twats, games and plenty of laughs. Here's a few examples.

Katir Price Fellates The Air- Proof that Jordan and little Pete were the maddest couple of 2009! Christian Bale Swears AT A Kid- The poor little lamb doesn't know what's going on!

Sammie Pennington's Sexy Game- Beat her at Rock, Paper, Scissors and get her kit off! Teisha Lowry Naked In The Sea- Give your desktop the gift of sexiness this Christmas! And 14 Days Of Cam Girls- Come back every day for a brand new, ultra sexy cam girl video. Enjoy the issue and once you've read it crack open the hooch and enjoy yourself. See you in two weeks.

Chinese police were held in a hour-long stand-off with a suspected suicide bomber only to find the man was armed with sausages. Police believed that the straps and bulky items around Sing He's waist were dynamite and detonators.

Mr He, 23, threatened to blow up a restaurant and its customers in Benxi, northern China, unless the staff handed over the contents of the till. But a specialist bomb unit called to the scene quickly determined that the device was assembled with pork products.

"When we saw what he had round his waist we couldn't help laughing. Some of the sausages still had the wrappers on them," said one bomb squad officer. "It must have been terrifying for the customers but those things would only have gone off if you'd kept them past their sell by date."