Make sure you have a constitution that can withstand a superhuman drug intake, you degenerate filth monkey. And make sure you bring along your Samoan attorney who is to drugs what competitive eating champion Takeru Kobayashi is to food. The man is a soldier.

I like the idea of a board game based around a crazed drug-induced search for the American Dream in the deserts of a place so corrupted if you dug into that sand deep enough you'd find politicians hiding with their second home and bags of dirty money.

And whoever's created it is auctioning it on eBay, so smoke a crack pipe, neck 20 tabs of LSD while freebasing a Columbian's face and get over there and get it you lazy drug fiend.

Be careful out there, if you're noming down on a bit of raw eggplant for lunch while sitting in the local park, taking in the last of the autumn sun, wondering why you didn't at least grill the damn thing, then be mindful. While the crisp radiant sun, the clean air, the hum of lazy autumn activity, along with the golden hues of the slowing-down earth make eating unprepared eggplant palatable, that vegetable is out of season.

Which means that if this man and his mission find you, your perishables could perish. This deadly marksman's set his sights on rooting out all unseasonal veg. If you're eating greens that are out of season, this assassin will exterminate them with extreme prejudice, and little conscience.

Next time you're eating marrow for dinner, make sure it's between the months of August and October, or consider yourself responsible for its untimely death from his eco-friendly firearm.