NINJA CAT AWESOMENESS !

It seems the Empire has fallen on hard times. Presumably to get finishing funds for his latest Death Star, Darth Vader-or a man pretending to be Darth Vader?-was reduced to robbing a bank on Long Island this morning.

Impotent Rebel Alliance security forces tell Newsday (paywall) that Vader marched into a Chase bank in Setauket around 11:30 a.m. today. Brandishing a completely unnecessary handgun-as he had the power to choke the oxygen out every teller's throat-the fallen Jedi demanded cash.

It's unclear whether he also found their lack of faith disturbing, but one Rebel policeman says, "The teller complied with the robber's demands and gave him money from the drawer."

Former hot dog speed-eating champion Takeru Kobayashi has been arrested at this year's event in New York. The six-time champion, who did not compete in this year's event, was arrested as he tried to get on the stage after the competition.

Mr Kobayashi had refused to sign a contract with the speed-eating body Major League Eating and was barred from the event at Coney Island. Joey "Jaws" Chestnut won the contest for the fourth year running. Mr Kobayashi, the thin Japanese contender who smashed all previous US records in 2001, jumped a barrier and tried to get up on the stage while the crowd chanted: "Let him eat!"

He briefly resisted police attempts to eject him from the stage, grabbing a barrier as they pulled him away. The 32-year-old has been charged with resisting arrest, trespass and obstructing governmental administration. Mr Kobayashi, nicknamed "The Tsunami", had written on his Japanese-languange blog that he didn't want to sign a contract that would prevent him from entering speed eating competitions run by other federations.