OTHERWORLDLY BEAUTY!

A sketch to be performed by Borat star Sacha Baron Cohen at Sunday's Oscar ceremony has been axed, reports say. According to the New York magazine, an Academy Awards spokesman confirmed that the British actor was no longer scheduled to perform at the Oscars.

It is thought he had planned to poke fun at James Cameron's film Avatar in a comedy routine with Ben Stiller.

It is understood that the Ali G star had planned to appear on stage as one of Avatar's fictional blue-skinned female Na'vi characters, with Stiller translating what she was saying. After a while, Sacha Cohen would become angry and reveal he was pregnant with Cameron's baby and confront the director about it, who will be sitting in the audience.

A recent move by Ausfailian politicians to attempt to ban pictures of women with small breasts from the internets has caught the attention of the internet hate machine known as Anonymous, who take censorship AND small breasts very seriously.

Despite being warned about the orbital ion cannons gathering overhead, the power level of the attack was over 9000 and there was nothing that the ausfailian government could do to stop it. Sites ending in gov.au were hit harder than a one legged ginger stepchild and either buckled under the strain or were hacked.

The first wave of the assault is over but the war has only just begun. Anyone working for the australian government can expect pornographic emails, fax spam, black faxes and pizzas that they didn't order for quite some time yet...