50 Things Women Do That Drive Men Crazy

1. Do not say what you mean. Ever. 2. Be ambiguous. Always. 3. Cry. Cry often. Tell them it's their fault. 4. Bring things up that were said, done, or thought months or years ago. 5. Make them ...
234 points

How to get an MA (Male Attitude)

Isn't it great being a bloke (for those that know!)..... Your arse is never a factor in a job interview. Your orgasms are real. Always. Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours...
239 points

Drunken

A local bar regular had been drinking all night. This particular night the regular drank a little more than usual. The bartender finally says that the bar is closing. So the regular stands up to l...
258 points

Don't Mess With Beautiful Women

A beautiful, voluptuous woman goes to a gynecologist. The doctor takes one look at this woman and all his professionalism goes out the window. Right away he tells her to undress. After she has dis...
243 points

Who says guys aren't sensitive ?

A woman meets a gorgeous man in a bar. They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together. They get back to his place, and as he shows her around his apartment, she notices that his bedroom ...
226 points

Office Dares

Office Dares Thing to keep you occupied at the office while you avoid work ! ONE-POINT DARES 1. Run one lap around the office at top speed 2. Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least...
241 points

Is There A Santa Claus

IS THERE A SANTA CLAUS??? 1. No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does ...
215 points

Young Man

A young man moved into a new apartment on his own, and went to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox. While there, an attractive young lady came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes weari...
236 points

The Unexplained Fantasy Of Marital Bliss

A married couple is lying in bed one night. The wife is curled up, ready to go to sleep, and the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book. As he's reading, he periodically reaches over to hi...
242 points

Computer Women

Computer Women Which Type Of Woman do you like ? HARD-DISK Woman: She remembers everything you say and do, FOREVER. !!! WINDOWS Woman: Everyone knows that she can't do anything right, but you ca...
215 points

The Lone Ranger

The Lone Ranger is captured by Indians... The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, you are the great Lone Ranger. In honor of the Harvest Festival, you will be executed in three days. But, before I kill y...
231 points

Pervy Parrot

A woman went to a pet shop & immediately spotted a large, beautiful parrot.. There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00. "Why so little," she asked the pet store owner. The owner looked a...
222 points

Dear Dr Laura

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination ac...
239 points

Extract from the Australian Etiquette Handbook

Extract from the Australian Etiquette Handbook 1. Never take a beer to a job interview. 2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting them. 3. It's tacky to take an esky to church. 4. If...
229 points

Aussie Aussie Aussie...

Aussie Aussie Aussie... We are the people of a free nation of blokes, sheilas and the occasional wanker. We come from many lands (although a few too many of us come from New Zealand), and altho...
247 points

Two Ants

There are two ants living in a girl's panties. One day they decide to go exploring in the caves. They said to meet back in the same spot in an hour. So, one ant went in one cave, and the other an...
242 points

First year MedSchool

First year MedSchool First-year students at MedSchool were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human body. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a...
229 points

Spicing Up Their Sex Life

A frustrated housewife decided her sex life needed spicing up after 20 years of marriage. After her husband went to work she slipped out and went into a lingerie shop and picked up a pair of crotc...
240 points

Gynecologists Never Change

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and was on the verge of being burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to change ca...
233 points

Walking The Dog

A little girl asked her Mom, "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?" Mom replies, "No, because she is in heat." "What's that mean?" asked the child. "Go ask your father. I think he'...
230 points

Sign in to continue

Bowman
Stay tuned with Kontraband

What's happening now:

loading..

Get the Kontraband App:

Follow us on Facebook:

Ninja2