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Australian Defination of A True Friend

Are you tired of all those namby, pamby, girly, sissy, completely wet "friendship" poems, that never come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that really speaks to true friendship...
112 points

Italian Lovers

A virile, middle aged Italian gentlemen named Guido was relaxing at his favorite bar in Rome when he managed to attract a spectacular young blonde woman. Things progressed to the point where he le...
63 points

Supposedly A True, Long (but good) Story

Dear Maid, Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the ...
65 points

For All you Lexophiles Out there

FOR LEXOPHILES (LOVERS OF WORDS): 1. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired. 2. A will is a dead giveaway. 3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. 4 A backward poe...
45 points

Dynamite!

A large, powerfully-built guy meets a woman at a bar. After a number of drinks, they agree to go back to his place. As they are making out in the bedroom, he stands up and starts to undress. After...
65 points

Romantic Valentines Verses

Romantic Valentines Verses If you get stuck - try some of these: These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line... but the least romantic ...
56 points

Things Difficult To Say When You're Drunk Part 2

a) Innovative b) Preliminary c) Proliferation d) Cinnamon Things that are VERY difficult to say when you're drunk... a) Specificity b) British Constitution c) Passive-aggressive disorder d) Trans...
68 points

Tarzan And Jane

After living in the jungle for a while Jane wanted to do the nasty with Tarzan and asked if he knew what sex was. "What's that?" he asked. She explained to him what sex was and he said, "Oh, Tarza...
70 points

Scary New Virus Warning !

There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally, and by hand. This virus is called Weary-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from any of your colleague...
62 points

M'mmmmmmm Beer !

Don't get me started... A man came home from work, sat down in his favourite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts." She looked a little puzzled,...
68 points

Top 10 Best Out-Of-Office Email Replies

1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood. 2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the off...
54 points

How To Pick Up Chicks

Taken from our friends at Ubersite.com Due to my recent reintroduction to bachelorhood and a four month absence of a social life, I have started looking towards Hollywood for new ways of meeting ...
67 points

Driver's Tests

The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's driving school (read at Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders....
49 points

Things That Make Men Proud Of Themselves !

1. OPENING JARS - She's struggling. You take it from her hands, open it effortlessly and pretend she loosened it for you. She didn't. Jars are men's work. 2. CALLING SOMEONE 'SON' - Especially po...
49 points

The Office :

WORDS OF WISDOM FROM DAVID BRENT If you can keep your head when all around you have lost theirs, then you probably haven't understood the seriousness of the situation. What does a squirrel do in ...
84 points

Dear God

Dear God One for all you non believers There was this fellow who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses. One day, a letter came to his de...
89 points

That's A Long Time Without Sex !!!

An old but still ruggedly handsome Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, ...
78 points

What Is Politics?:

What Is Politics?: A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalis...
66 points

The BEST Geek Quotes Ever!

1/ There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't. 2/ If at first you don't succeed; call it version 1.0 3/ I'm not anti-social; I'm just not user f...
63 points

Great Quotes On Suburbia -- Part 1

Wack, Fun, Pointed -- Even Serious -- Quotes That Folks In The Burbs Will 'Appreciate'...Life, Features, Frustrations, Amusements. On The Inner Workings of The House... "In my house there's this...
59 points

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