That's the kind where you feel the sh#t come out, have sh#t on the toilet paper, but there is no sh#t in the toilet.
The kind where you sh#t it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
Second Wave Sh#t
It happens when you're done sh#tting, you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realise that you have to sh#t some more.
Brain Hemorrage Sh#t
Also known as "Pop a vein in your forehead " sh#t. the kind where you strain so much to get it out that you practically have a stroke.
The kind of sh#t that is so huge that you're afraid to flush the toilet without breaking it into a few pieces with your toilet brush
That is the kind of sh#t that you have the morning after a long night of drinking - it's most noticeable trait is the skid marks left on the bottom of the toilet .
"Gee I wish I could sh#t" Sh#t
Its the kind of sh#t where you want to sh#t, but all you do is sit on the toilet with cramps and fart a few times.
Spinal Tap Sh#t
That's the one where it hurts so much coming out that you swear it was leaving you sideways.
Wet Cheeks Sh#t Also known as "The Power Dump"
That's the kind that comes out of your ass so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water.
The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your butt, splashes all over the inside of the toilet bowl and, at the same time, chronically burns your tender poop-chute.
Mexican Food Sh#t
A class all its own
The Crowd Pleaser
This sh#t is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you have to show it to someone.
This sh#t occurs after a lengthy period of constipation, allowing you to be your old self again.
This sh#t occurs at the same time time each day and is accomplished with the aid of a newspaper.
Guiness Book of Records Sh#t
A sh#t so noteworthy it should be recorded for future generations.
The Aftershock Sh#t
This sh#t has an odor so powerful that anyone entering the vicinity within the next 7 hours is effected.
The Honeymoons Over Sh#t
This is any sh#t created in the presence of another person.
A sh#t so huge it cannot exit without vocal assistance.
Characterized by its floatability, this sh#t has been known to resurface after many flushes.
A sh#t which refuses to let go. It is usually necessary to engage in a rocking or bouncing motion, but quite often the only solution is to push it away with a small piece of toilet paper.
This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit putting it there.
Now you see it, now you don't. This sh#t is playing games with you. Requires patience and muscle control.
A sh#t that comes as a complete surprise at a time that is either inappropriate to sh#t (i.e. during love making or a root canal) or you are nowhere near sh#tting facilities.
A long skinny sh#t which has managed to coil into a frightening position - usually harmless Olympic Sh#t. This sh#t occurs exactly one hour prior to the start of any competitive event in which you are entered and bears a close resemblance to the Drinkers sh#t.